Dear Expectant Mother,
Hello from California - I'm John! Thank you for taking some time to learn about me and for considering me as you search to find a loving and nurturing home for your child. I will be adopting as a single father, and while I do hope to find that special partner to share my life, I am ready and excited to become a dad and am eager to build my family through adoption. I respect that you are making a very thoughtful decision and I appreciate your consideration of me as a possible parent for your child.
My Family:
I grew up in Upstate New York as the middle of three children. My parents worked hard to build a future for their children and in the process taught me the importance of education, hard work, and compassion for others. I had a full childhood, always busy with sports, music, school, and after-school jobs.
My older brother now lives in Boston with his wife, and my younger sister lives in Connecticut with her husband and their four kids. I am very close to my family, rely on them for support, and spend time with them as often as I can. They are ALL excited and supportive of my decision to adopt and can't wait to meet the newest member of the family.
My Journey:
I grew up knowing that I would one day go to college and find a career that suits my interests, makes me happy, and adds value to my community. I also grew up knowing that I wanted to have a family of my own one day. I went to college at Cornell where I studied Biology, and then to Cornell Medical College where I earned my doctorate degree, also in Biology. I've had some great adventures along the way, including six months working as a deck hand on sail boats in Maine and the Caribbean and three months backpacking through Nepal, India, and Thailand. I now have a career that I love, friends and family that make me happy, and I can't wait to guide a child as they find their own path through life.
My Career:
I work in the Biotechnology Industry developing new therapies for cancer, and my company and co-workers have brought many new disease-changing therapies to patients all over the world. My career is important to me, as is my time away from work. Fortunately, my company understands and values the importance of maintaining a balance between work and personal life, and provides great benefits to help their employees maintain this balance including an adoption assistance program, paid family leave for adopting parents, and a fantastic on site daycare facility.
My Bicycles:
Well, I love bicycles - everything about them. I have six bikes and each one has a different history and purpose. I ride to work regularly, and around the city all the time. It's a great way to clear my head at the start and end of a day at work, get some exercise, and do my part to protect our environment. Many of my friends are bicyclists and we get together for quick rides around the city, weekend rides outside of the city, or a barbecue at one of our homes. One of my best vacations was a few years back when a group of us went to France to watch Lance Armstrong win his fifth Tour de France. Afterward, we spent two weeks riding our bikes through the South of France. One of these friends had a baby boy less than a year ago, two others are now pregnant, and I can't wait to take another similar trip some day with all our kids in tow. One thing you can be sure of is that we will have the best tricycles on the block!
My Pottery:
I moved to San Francisco fifteen years ago to take a new job, knowing only two other people here. I signed up for a pottery class, something I had wanted to try for years, because I thought it would be a good way to meet some new people outside of work. I stayed with this pottery studio for nearly ten years, in part because it offered me an artistic outlet outside of work, but even more for the group of friends I had made through the clay studio. I no longer go to the studio, but am still close with the friends I came to know through pottery. The studio owner runs classes for children who are age five and up, and I would be thrilled to share my love of pottery with a child.
My Cats:
The truth is that I have always thought of myself as a dog person, but I ended up with two cats, Cesar and York, and I am pretty confident that they are the two most beautiful cats that you have ever seen. One of them, Cesar, is probably the sweetest too. She loves dogs and kids and gets all excited when friends come over. I would still love to get a dog one day, but I can't imagine not having Cesar and York around.
My Home and Neighborhood:
I have had the opportunity to live in some wonderful places and feel incredibly lucky to now call San Francisco my home. I live in a beautiful Edwardian style home. My kitchen is definitely the heart of my home and is a great place to relax and cook dinner with family and friends. My house has an in-law apartment on the first floor that is always open for visiting friends and family, and would make a perfect home for a part-time Nanny. My neighborhood is very diverse, with a mixture of ethnicities and cultures, fantastic shops and restaurants, and some great parks, playgrounds, and schools. A walk down the street to the playground could easily turn into a fun lesson about geography, history, language, and social responsibility. I feel that San Francisco is a great place for a child to grow up.
My Friends:
Being single and living far from my family, my friends are incredibly important to me. I am blessed with a large group of loving caring friends who I can call on for support and who can call on me anytime for the same in return. I am lucky to have them in my life. I am also blessed with a smaller core group of friends who I consider family. I am "Uncle JP" to their kids and they will be aunts and uncles to mine. Several of my friends have either had children recently or are pregnant now, and I can't wait to watch our kids grow up together. There will be plenty of play dates, sleepovers, and camping trips with our friends.
My Values:
My parents taught me to respect myself and others and to value education, family, and community. I can now thank them for my strong moral compass guided by a "do unto others" mentality - karma, pay it forward, whatever you want to call it. I believe that we are all very fortunate to be on this earth, that we have an obligation to take care of it and each other, and that our lives are richer when we do.
My Hopes for a Child:
Our world is changing. I want to raise a child to appreciate what our world is becoming and to help make it a better place. I will insure that a child grows up knowing that they are loved, valued, and respected, and understanding the value of education, family, and friends. I believe that much of this can be taught, and I can't wait to get started.
As a single Dad, it will be especially important that my child grow up knowing love for their mother for the strength and love that allowed her to make the decision of adoption for them. I am open to us figuring out how we can maintain an ongoing and positive relationship in your child's life, whatever level of contact you desire.
I wish you the best on your journey and hope that you find the family you feel will be best for your child. I would feel fortunate to meet you and for us to get to know each other. If you would like to reach me directly please feel free to call me toll free any time at 1-877-288-9858 or email me at johninsanfrancisco@gmail.com. You can also contact my friendly adoption attorney, Susan Romer, at 1.800.U.ADOPT.US or email to adamsromer@aol.com
